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Ain't Life A Bitch	...And Heres Why...

MusiqSoulProdigy
read my profile sign my guestbook Name: Jeff Country: Austria Metro: Vienna Birthday: 8/19/1987 Gender: Male Message: message me AIM: musiqsoulprodigy Member Since: 4/11/2005

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Tuesday, April 29, 2008

So, I realize it has been a long time since I have updated this....and by "a long time" I mean 2 years haha. But recently I have had a lot on my mind so I thought I should kind of get everything out of my head and put it down in writing.

For some reason this past year has been a really difficult one for me and I am not really sure why. I mean don't get me wrong, I am happy with things....for the most part. It really has been a big growing time for me because I think I am finally starting to understand.....that there are some things and people, that I will just never understand.....if that makes any sense.

One of the problems that I have been facing recently is what I want to do with my future here at CMU because I am just not content with where I am at right now.....what I am doing right now, isn't what I want. it really has been a big internal struggle for me this semester, a lot of that has been coming from the 2 things that I have the most fun with here at Central.....Fish N Chips and SAE. I really love both of these groups, more than I probably should to be honest, but I just feel sometimes like maybe I haven't made the right choice in my life, more so recently than ever before in my life

The first thing is Fish N Chips. The problem that I have had recently with the group is that I don't feel the same about it as I once did and in turn that is changing the way that some of the people in the group look at me. I am losing passion for something that I once loved and I can't seem to figure out why and it is making me really think about hat I am doing and why I can't seem to figure it out.

The other thing is SAE. SAE is something that I am so passionate for and I have such strong feelings for in my life but for some reason.....something just doesn't feel right. Now I am going to be totally honest and I don't want to offend anyone because that isn't my intention and I don't know if anyone will ever read this anyway but here goes. I live my life the way that I want to live it and I make the choices in it. I really appreciate the people around me giving their opinion,....when I ask for it, but if I don't ask for it then I don't want to know how you think I should live my life. Now I love my brothers but like I was saying earlier, I just don't understand some of them and in turn it is making it very hard for me to be around them. How do you tell someone that their personality is the reason that you don't want to be around them? I just wish that the fakeness would go away because I can't handle it. I feel like there are people around me whose sole is to try to get to the top and they don't care who or how many people they have to tear down in the process to get there as long as they get there. I just can't help but feel.......that I may soon be distancing myself from something that I really love and hold dear to me, and it is really starting to tear at me......I just don't know

I feel like I don't know much of anything right now....

3:18 AM - 46 views - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Currently Listening
Straight Outta Ca$hville
By Young Buck
STOMP
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WHO JUST FINISHED FINALS???????

JEFF DID!!!

WHO NEVER UPDATES THIS SHIT?????

JEFF DOESN'T!!!

WHO DOESN'T GIVE A FUCK???????

JEFF DOESN'T

WHO NEVER HAS TO SEE THAT STUPID FAT ASS DISCUSSION SECTION LEADER FOR HST 112, WHO CLAIMS TO BE A BLACK BELT IN 2 DIFFERENT FORMS OF KIRATE, BUT IN REALITY THE ONLY THING SHE HAS A BLACK BELT IN IS MCDONALD'S, WHO CAN'T EVEN LIFT HER FUCKING LEG OFF THE GROUND ONE FOOT NONE THE LESS HIGH ENOUGH TO KICK ANYTHING OTHER THAN A WEEBLE.....WHO EVERYONE KNOWS WILL WOBBLE BUT NEVER FALL DOWN????????????

JEFF DOESN'TTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2:19 PM - 41 views - 12 eprops - 6 comments - email it

Monday, October 03, 2005

Currently Listening
Juslisen
By Musiq
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Ok, time for the random late night post in the Xanga. Ok, hmmmm, where to begin......Well, lets start with Homecoming. Ok, tell me why the whole fucking world was at that damn game......This is Avondale people, we pick the worst teams possible and play them for homecoming. Whatever happened at the game I don't think it was so earth shattering that you couldn't read about what Kozmo had to say the next day and feel totally fulfilled.........O and tell me why the school looks fucking AMAZING......Let me tell you, every fine arts performance I go to see this next year better be fucking incredible, I mean, I better see the best theatre performances of my life. The band better stop sounding like they consist of 60 Sherrin Delizio's. And the Choir better sound better than CMU's. O, and by the way it was good seeing all the people that I have'nt seen in a while at the game, it was fun....boring.....but fun. Ok, moving on

Saturday, my parents decided to take us out to dinner, where you ask? O you know only, THE BUSIEST PLACE IN THE FUCKING WORLD BECAUSE IT WAS THE NIGHT OF HOMECOMING.....Eastside Mario's. So we were the re for a good 2 hours of my life, then came home and chilled.

Sunday. Sunday is the first time this week that I almost died(I say it like that because God DEFINITELY wanted me to die this past week). Sunday is the day we got hit by a fucking tsunami, and o yeah , I was driving north on 75 when it hit, so then I rush to the dorm to go to my male a capella groups practice( CD's availale soon) and it is still fucking pouring but can I find an umbrella, of course not, so I get fucking DRENCHED. Then I get equally drenched on the way back from practice. Not a great day all around.

Monday. Everything is going pretty well, until I go to my fucking history class, I walk outside, to leave the class. And what happens, I get hit by a fucking Bike, A MOTHER FUCKING BIKE. So that kinda pissed me off, then as I am walking back to my dorm 2 minutes later, I almost get hit by a fucking car, that is RIDICULOUS.

Nothing really happened the rest of the week.......

Saturday. I was going to go out and party Saturday night, but my head started to hurt so I didnt I just kinda stayed in and just kinda chilled. Then at 3:30 AM all my roommates come busting in Drunk as hell, telling me all about it. Drunk people are really funny, let me tell you. So yeah, here we are on Sunday night, and I fucking missed dinner tonight because, who the fuck knew the dining commons closed at 6:30, anyway, I'm out, Holla at cha later....

2:41 AM - 36 views - 6 eprops - 3 comments - email it

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Currently Listening
Aijuswanaseing
By Musiq Soulchild
Love
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ok, for all ya'll who been livin' under a rock the past 3 months......I graduated from high school.

. I'm at CMU so if anyone wants to come and visit just hit up the cell the cell. Ok now I KNOW the only reason ya'll read this is because you think that the shit that happens to me is the funniest shit in the world.....and in the past few weeks, I have't let you down

.
Ok, so some of you know that I am into Gospel music.....and if you didnt know that....welll....I'm into gospel music. So I found out that CMU had a gospel choir so I had to join that. Now, if you are reading this and asking yourself "wow, I didn't know Jeff sings"

where the fuck have you been?!?! Go sit in a corner and cry because that means you have never met me......and I therfore think you are a stalker....So anyway, I went to the first practice for the gospel choir and it was very awkward, and not just because I was the only white person in the room out of 30 people, it was also awkward because these are some SERIOUS religous people I that choir. So we start singing songs and it is going really good, I really like it.....and then.....the director announces that we will be singing a new song and he says the name (and I can't remember the name right now....) but as soon as he says it one of the members starts to scream at the top of her lungs.....over and over again....then she runs off the stage and into the hall and keeps screaming, and everyone is just standing there looking at each other.....so then the conductor says that she was touched by the holy ghost.....but I was thinking that the holy ghost more grabbed her and was making her convulse.....strangest thing in the world....o yeah, but it gets better....

.....so we finally start to sing the song and then you hear this other girl in the back kinda scream kinda moan like she was giving birth....it honestly sounded like there was a fetus coming out of her vagina. So she goes to the front of the choir while we are singing and puts one hand in the air and starts praising his name.....not just on the stage but, she goes like around the building doing this.....and I am freaked the fuck out. But I keep singing none the less, then holy ghost victim # 3 made her way to the front of the choir and she starts yelling at random members of the choir "PRAISE HIS NAME! PRAISE HIS NAME!" At this point I am utterly speechless....so I look around and all but like 3 people are crying....so finally the song ends and he says that we were dismissed and I almost like ran out of that bitch.....I was the first one out.....because I was affraid the holy ghost would catch me
So there is my dramatic story of the time being here.....hope it made ya chuckle.....because apparenly my life is hilfuckenlarious.....

2:36 AM - 41 views - 8 eprops - 4 comments - email it

Thursday, August 04, 2005

Currently Listening
I Need an Angel
By Ruben Studdard
Center of My Joy
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Ok, so I have decided that the whole cedar point stuff is over its done with, whatever....I'm done with it, and I don't care....I appoligise for getting angry at people before....its old news....I don't care anymore.....but just for the record....I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM WITH MICHAEL COLE....just stating that for the record...Oh, I also just wanted to say that my arm is sore from that stupid Tetnis shot....Bye

1:59 AM - 13 views - 4 eprops - 2 comments - email it

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